Funny Quotes by Soccer Players

Some soccer players are known for their talent on the pitch. Some are known for their controversies off the pitch. Others are known for their surprising mastery of Olympic diving.

A number of them are known for their witty tongues, and some of them are known for their not-so-bright comments. Either way, hilarity always ensues. Here is a list of some of the funniest quotes by soccer players.

Roberto Baggio is one of the greatest Italian strikers ever to have graced the game. Recognized by his Divin Codino (Divine Ponytail), Baggio is distinguished by being the only Italian to score in three World Cups. He is more infamous for a goal he did not score, however, in the penalty shootout of the 1994 FIFA World Cup Final against Brazil. He set up the shot and ended up blasting the ball over the crossbar, giving Brazil a 3-2 victory. Curiously, in each of the three World Cups he has played in, he has ultimately lost in a penalty shootout decision.

"I received a shot and broke my tooth. Unfortunately, we Italians only eat pasta al dente."

"It's better to have ten disorganized players than ten organized runners."

"I have lost three World Cups, all on penalties ... If you'll allow me this, it really gets on my nerves."

France's top goal scorer of all time and a prolific goalscorer during his Arsenal days, Thierry Henry has enjoyed success both at club and country. Winner of the 1998 FIFA World Cup, he was involved with controversy during the 2010 World Cup qualifiers. During the match against Ireland, Henry controlled the ball with his hand twice and set up the goal that clinched France a spot in the World Cup. Because of this and numerous other negative tactics like diving, he is not my favourite player. He does have some (stupidly) funny quotes, though.

"It's difficult to talk about Pele because I didn't see him."

"I may be French, but I'm playing for Arsenal."

"Sometimes in football you have to score goals."

One of the greatest free kick takers, David Beckham is known for being able to constantly give the accurate crosses and deadly shots in set pieces. While he is hardworking and one of England's best players in the last few decades, he is not the sharpest knife in the drawer. These quotes reflect that all too well.

"I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened, but I don't know into what religion yet."

"Alex Ferguson is the best manager I've ever had at this level. Well, he's the only manager I've actually had at this level. But he's the best manager I've ever had."

"My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about 7."

“I have come to accept that if I have a new haircut it is front page news. But having a picture of my foot on the front page of a national newspaper is a bit exceptional.”

“People don't think I've got the brains to be that clever.”

4 Premier League Titles in 5 years and voted Manchester United's greatest football player ever, Eric Cantona or "King Eric" was a bit of a jack of all trades. Early on in his career he played goalie, was known for his vision and skill as a forward, and has even ventured into film and music roles. He is also known to be witty, as seen by these quotes.

"I prefer to play and lose rather than win, because I know in advance I'm going to win."

“After his first training session in heaven, George Best, from his favourite right wing, turned the head of God, who was filling in at left-back. I would love him to save me a place in his team - George Best that is, not God.”

“No, it is me.” - when asked if the greatest-ever French player is Michel Platini or Zinedine Zidane

If he's not Brazil's greatest striker, he's certainly in the top 2 or 3. Romario is a legend, claimed to have scored 1000 goals in his career. A dominating force in clubs like PSV Eindenhoven, Flamengo and mighty Barcelona, o Baixinho (Tiny One) is known for his passion to soccer as well as his somewhat cocky nature. It might be well deserved though, given his accomplishments.

"The day I was born, God laid eyes on me and said: 'He's the man.'"

"I'm like money, at the end of the day everybody quite likes me."

"The goalscorer always deserves some credit but not this time. The way I hit that, even my mother would have saved it."

"There's nothing I like more than football ...except for sex."

"Wherever my name appears it's linked to a scandal. Trouble follows me around, but that's ok. I'm like an Indian; I only hit out when I've been attacked first."

"I wish God had warned me not to say some of the stupid things I've come out with on occasion."

Drogba has been Chelsea's best and most dominating striker since his inclusion with the club in 2004. Known for his strength, speed and skill, Drogba is also infamous for diving. Nonetheless, he is still one of the world's best strikers and a significant player for Cote D'Ivoire.

“Sometimes I dive, sometimes I stay up.”

“Unfortunately in the emotion of winning the game my comments have come across partly in the wrong way. I want to make clear that I don't dive.”

"It must be frightening for our rivals when we are not playing well but still winning every game... When we play badly our rivals must think: `What are Chelsea going to be like when they are playing well`?"

An extravagant footballer who led an extravagant life, George Best was one of the greatest footballers of all time. Combining pace, balance and creativity with a talent for scoring with either foot, the best of Best was short lived due to problems with gambling, womanizing and alcoholism. The latter was the cause of his death in 2005. George Best still lives on, remembered for his incredible skill in football and for his witty sayings.

"I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered."

"He cannot kick with his left foot, he cannot head a ball, he cannot tackle and he doesn't score many goals. Apart from that he's all right." - on David Beckham

Sue Barker: "What happened next?"
Best: "Well, there's no point in asking me. I can't remember what happened last night!"

"I used to go missing a lot: Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World."

"I once said Gazza's IQ was less than his shirt number and he asked me: "What's an IQ?" - on Paul Gascoigne

Perhaps the greatest quote of Best is one that he himself didn't make. Fans of Northern Ireland are known for this saying: Maradona good, Pele better, George Best.

Widely regarded as the greatest player of all time, like Best Maradona is a player rife with skill and controversy. Well known for his "Hand of God" goal against England in 1986, and for his even more memorable goal in that same match voted as the "Goal of the Century", dribbling past 6 English players to score the winning goal. His brief stint as the coach of Argentina brought the team together and attempted to create a unique identity and style, though it did not succeed as hoped. Maradona is a legend without a doubt, and skill on the pitch will always be remembered alongside his sayings off the pitch.

“My first dream is to play in the World Cup, and my second is to win it.” - a 12-year-old Maradona

“I haven’t seen him lately. I tried to call him but it’s easier talking to Obama than Lio. I’ve heard he's having a good pre-season and that’s great to know.” - on Messi

“I was and always will be happy with my Hand of God goal against the English. I offer them a thousand apologies – that’s the truth - but I’d do it again a thousand times.”